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There are so many suggestions and innuendos on what a healthy relationship is and what it is not. A lot of the examples that we see come from social media or reality TV, and if we are honest some of us are just navigating without a parachute. Sheesh and that’s from the adult view.

However, what about our teens?
You know the population who is influenced by the above genre the most.
In working with teens, we see that self-esteem and self-worth, or the lack thereof is a deadly formula that puts a mark on their back for heartbreak, misunderstanding, and sometimes abuse.

When you don’t love yourself you become an easy prey for toxicity. Examples of this are the young girl or boy who never received nurturing, love, or affection. This will be the teen looking for love in all the wrong places. The kid who accepts any affection because face it, it’s better than nothing at all.

Or the young person with the example of parents who argue as a means of effective communication.  9 out of 10 this will be the teen who is the aggressor when they begin a relationship.

The last one… the child where nothing they do is ever good enough.
This is the youngster who will accept belittlement, disrespect, and yes they are even prone to experience violence because they are in a low state.

As we enter into Respect Week these are some of the matters facing the youth served. We must intervene. In order to help or be a solution we have to point the child back to their individual self.

In group settings, this may start with questions or statements such as,

Do you like you?

Do you love you?

Give me one positive word that describes you.

 

This opens for discussion and allows us to encourage and teach youth to have a great level of love and respect for self. For many, this may be new as they have been in an unhealthy relationship with themselves, which has affected their relationships with others. Ouch!

The only way for us to have beneficial prevention is to point youth back to a healthy regard for self. If we create this as the foundation, then we give them a pretty good start on recognizing who or what is healthy for them.

It goes back to the core. One of the most important relationships one will ever have is the one with self. So, treat yourself with love and respect.
Treat yourself well, you deserve it!

About the Author

Stefanie Hayes
Expect Respect Facilitator
HCDVCC