As another October begins, so does Domestic Violence Awareness Month. While everything in the world turns pink for breast cancer awareness from luncheons to the NFL, domestic violence needs a bigger share of the spotlight. And this year, the timing could not be more urgent. Our movement is facing a perfect storm: a federal shutdown, budget cuts, and the rising costs of food, childcare, and basic needs.
While cuts to cancer research make the news and outrages the public, no one is talking about domestic violence services being slashed, advocates laid off, or their salaries being cut even further. An analogy that is often used, put your oxygen mask on before helping others with theirs, but what if your mask is empty?
I was recently reading a report where an oversight agency kept telling a domestic violence survivor to get dv services. But what does that mean? Does that mean calling a hotline and waiting for hours on the phone to try to get help, only to be told there is no room at the shelter, a months-long waiting list to receive services, or we cannot help you with that? But here is the thing: survivors are not stuck because they lack resilience. They are stuck because the safety net is stretched too thin and survivors are remaining in abusive situations because there is no way out. During COVID, when federal funds flowed, survivors had options, agencies expanded, and safety felt possible. If we could do it then, we can do it now, if we choose to invest.
And investment does not just mean government funding. Possibility is already everywhere. Churches, health care clinics, universities, and community centers — our partners in the Domestic Violence Assistance Fund and the Early Childhood Resiliency Fund — are showing what is possible when more people step in. Imagine if every business, every institution, every neighbor asked: what role can I play in survivor safety?
The answers do not have to be complicated-Challenge yourself to find out what support a domestic violence agency needs- do they need volunteers, do they need money (most will say yes to this!), do they need food, toiletries, or gift cards? Sponsor an event for their staff, offer scholarships for training, and most importantly support their fundraising events by purchasing tickets and bid outrageously on their auction items. Support them like you would your child’s sports team! And keep doing it all year long!
Most of all, let us change the conversation. People proudly say they “survived cancer.” Survivors of domestic violence should get the same dignity and visibility. No shame, no silence, just humanity and recognition. Do not stop when Halloween rolls around. Survivors need and deserve more than a month of awareness. Survivors and those who work tirelessly to support them need your imagination, your resources, and your everyday action to build a world where safety is the norm, not the exception.
