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Community Share Op-eds

HAWC Commitment to Engaging in the Magnolia Park/Manchester Community

People associate the Houston Area Women’s Center with domestic and sexual violence and while our mission continues to be to “End domestic and sexual violence for ALL”, we recognize that prevention is more than just talking about it. While our prevention team educates community members on what domestic violence and sexual violence is and how it impacts the community, they are also working with communities themselves to address some of the core factors of violence.

Often times organizations come in with the idea that “they” know what the community needs, when in reality the only people who know what they’re needing are those who live in the community. One way our team has been doing this in the Magnolia Park/Manchester community, a predominately Hispanic/Latinx community, is through meeting with community members and leaders to get an understanding of what’s happening in the community.

We are also working with community schools to recruit students who want to impact their community and receive evidence-based prevention curriculum. The Be Strong curriculum works with young women to encourage empowerment, healthy boundaries and community involvement. The Live Respect Curriculum focuses on young men and challenges their concepts of masculinity and respect.

We are also working in establishing a student and adult advisory board, to give us insight on what the community needs are. Since both groups will be made up of community members, we will ensure the voices of those we’re hearing are voices from the community. In addition, youth participating in Be Strong, Live Respect and the Student Advisory Board will be able to match with a mentor from the Magnolia Park/Manchester Committee. Mentors will be identified through the Adult Advisory Board members, community leaders and interested community partners.

Most recently we have collaborated with the Magnolia Park Dia de los Muertos event. During the event, we will be hosting an art competition with the theme “Celebrating Life” and highlighting the lives of those who were killed as a result of domestic and sexual violence. By participating in community events like these, we are recognizing the importance of the events to the community, as well as providing resources that perhaps the community was not aware of previously. Through supporting community voices, we are able to identify needs within the community so we can focus on community activism and therefore create an environment without violence.

About the Author

Isabel Martinez
Director of Violence Prevention
HAWC

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Community Share Op-eds

How one Survivor Stopped the Cycle

In April 2020, I found myself hopeless, homeless, afraid, and ashamed as a result of domestic violence. I felt very alone, I knew hardly no one in Houston, and at the time, didn’t have enough money to leave the home I shared with my partner, although he was abusive. In the middle of the pandemic, the abuse I’d experienced became worse. As a result, I fled my home and went to the Houston Area Women’s Center (HAWC) for nearly three months. I thank my Creator every day for the services I received at HAWC.

All of the resources I received at HAWC (e.g., shelter, food, legal assistance, etc.) were absolutely awesome and I’m eternally gratefully. However, the individual and group therapy I received at the shelter changed my life, for the rest of my life. I began to understand ‘why’ I accepted abuse. I learned skills that empowered me and has helped me navigate life after making the decision to walk away and stay away from the abusive relationship. I am no longer ashamed to share that I coexist with mental health diagnoses, for which, I have a mental health plan that includes ongoing therapy.

I am now committed to raising awareness around domestic and intimate partner violence and removing the stigma of mental health.

O yeah, I am happy to report that I serve on the Board of Director’s for the very shelter that changed my life (#GOHAWC), and I NOW live an abuse free life, full of joy, peace, hope and happiness, which I know is what I’ve always deserved! And now I share my story with hope and prayer that others know they are deserving of an abuse free life full of joy, peace, hope and happiness too!

About the Author

Jamie Wright - DV Survivor and Advocate
Jamie Wright
DV Survivor Turned Advocate
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Op-eds

The headline is always the same “Children were not harmed”

child thinking
“I’m afraid of not unlearning the bad things my parents taught me.”
― Trista Mateer, Aphrodite Made Me Do It

The headline is always the same “Children were not harmed”; that headline always makes me cringe.

Last Wednesday night Erica Allen, an elementary school principal, loss her life at the hands of her husband Nicholas Allen, who was an assistant principal. He later took his own life; their two children were in the home during this event. The children are two and seven years old.

The children have been harmed.

Below is a video I often share during training on the affects of domestic violence on children. You may be familiar with it; if not it is a great tool to help the audience see how the violence in the home is shaping the children and also a reminder to victim advocates and first responders about trauma informed care.

About the Author

HCDVCC Training Director,
Thecia Jenkins

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Community Share Op-eds Title IX

The Power of Collaboration

Working with the HCDVCC (Title IX Committee) has provided me more access to up to date domestic and sexual violence information. The committee has helped me navigate the many policy changes in my role as Title IX Coordinator at College of the Mainland.

Being a part of HCDVCC group has allowed me to tap into the knowledge and expertise of my peers for best practices. It is a wonderful support network that provides a variety of training, resources, and professional connections. It has truly been an empowering experience working with others in the field to brainstorm and collaborate. I am so fortunate to work with so many passionate professionals I can turn to for support. We use our collective power as a group to share valuable resources.

I am confident knowing with HCDVCC I am not alone in this important work and support is only a phone call away! I am grateful for the many resources the agency has provided that I can share with my students and college community.

About the Author

Sarah David, Director of Institution Equity and Title IX Coordinator at College of The Mainland
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Op-eds Stress Awareness

April is Stress Awareness Month

April is Stress Awareness Month

7 Ways to Destress:

1. Get a change of scenery – If you are working remotely from home try another room in your home to work. A trip to the beach or local park working from your wi-fi for a couple of hours so that you can enjoy nature while you work.
2. Take a social media timeout – Social media is an excellent tool and I personally love it; however, it can also be distracting and studies show it can increase depression and anxiety secondary to the social phenomenon of FOMO or otherwise known as Fear Of Missing Out. Give yourself and timeout and focus on your personal goals, accomplishments and gratitude.
3. Tap into inner artist – Coloring books for adults are gaining popularity and can be easily found on Amazon. Coloring is a great strategy for relaxing and increasing one’s creativity. How many of remember the paint by numbers, those were cool!
4. Dance like no one is watching – the chemicals released during physical activity also help release stress from your body. So turn-up and move to the beat until you are wore out from the laughter and joy of movement.
5. Face the issue – Stress can also the be result of dodging necessary conversations and addressing challenges in our lives. So make the decision to have that crucial conversation or a plan to tackle that financial crisis so that you can breathe and move on.
6. Go to sleep – The body needs at least six hours of sleep to operate at its best level so ensure that you are getting proper rest for the body to rejuvenate.
7. Love yourself – Write yourself a love letter to remind yourself of how amazing you are; it is easy to lose ourselves in the lives of those around us that we are supporting. Make sure you are reminding yourself that you are important and the value that you bring everyday.

About the Author

HCDVCC Training Director,
Thecia Jenkins

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Op-eds

What becomes of the youngest victims of domestic violence?

What becomes of the youngest victims of domestic violence? Who do they become and what becomes their view of the world?

I am convinced that so much of the brutality, selfishness and emotional numbness we witness while working with families affected by domestic and sexual violence is a direct result of adults who did not have access to counseling or other positive role models to combat the abuse they witnessed throughout their childhood.

Programs for children and youth are so important to equip the youngest survivors of abuse so they can reinvent their story and how they will choose to show up in the world; a healthier version of their upbringing. Children see themselves as an extension of their parents and that is natural because we are literally created by our parents; and yes it could be easy to assume that because my parent is abusive that is who I am too.

Counseling, primary prevention programming and mentorship can break the generational cycles of abuse. Thank you to all the programs that are integrating children and youth services into your work. You are building a healthier tomorrow and helping children and youth embrace who they are by building self-confidence and self-efficacy. It also an opportunity to help them see the good qualities of their parents and integrate those into their lives while recognizing that they parents may not be bad people, simply people who had bad things happen and did not resolve and re-write a healthier narrative.

About the Author

HCDVCC Training Director,
Thecia Jenkins

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Community Share Op-eds

March as Brain Injury Awareness Month

HCDVCC is proud to join with the Brain Injury Association of America and advocates across the country to recognize March as Brain Injury Awareness Month. It is critical to educate advocates and the public on the intersection of traumatic brain injury (TBI) and intimate partner violence (IPV).
What is TBI?
an injury to the brain that is caused by external physical force and is not present at birth or degenerative such as:
– A blow to the head e.g., being hit on the head forcefully with object or fist, having one’s
head smashed against object/wall, falling and hitting head, gunshot to head.
– Shaking of the brain e.g., forceful whip-lash motion, actions that force the brain to hit the wall of the skull.
– A loss of oxygen to the brain (anoxia) e.g., airway obstruction caused by choking, strangulation, near drowning or drug reactions.

TBI can be mild to severe and cause many detrimental effects that impede the pursuit of safety and economic stability.
More than 5.3 million Americans are living with traumatic brain injury-related disabilities at a cost of more than $76.5 billion (in 2010 dollars) each year. The number of people who sustain brain injuries and do not seek treatment is unknown including and especially IPV survivors. More than 3.6 million people sustain an acquired brain injury (any injury to the brain that is not hereditary, congenital, degenerative, or induced by birth trauma each year). That’s one in every 60 people. Few are aware of it, but head injury kills more Americans under the age of 34 than all other causes combined!

About the Author

Abeer Monem is the Director of Housing and Innovative Services for HCDVCC and has worked in the field of domestic violence for over 25 years in both Harris and Fort Bend counties as a domestic violence advocate, trainer and programs director.

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Op-eds

Holding The Wrench

As one of those who have been around in our field pretty much since its inception, I came into our work at one of the darkest times in my life. There at the beginning, I got to be part of something that I did not know was to grow and develop into what it is today. Never had I been at the advent of something.

Then, which was 1975, I had my great, “for a woman,” nice middle management job at the research and training arm of Texas Department of Mental Health and Mental Retardation in the Texas Medical Center where one of my station did not make policy. Policy came down from on high.

This was the beginning of the resurgence of the women’s movement. Women would ask me if I had seen this coming and gotten ahead of the curve. Nothing could have been farther from the actual reason. My unstable marriage needed the comfort of knowing I and the children could survive if the rug were pulled out from under us.

I endured a long and terrible divorce. Like being on a roller coaster screaming to get off, but not being able to until the ride was over, the ride finally stopped. I staggered to the platform. Little did I know then what working to help end violence, abuse, and control of women following would be my life’s work.

The lesson learned is sometimes darkest days guide us to new meaning, value, relationships with wonderful, talented, ethical, and dedicated others. And in so doing, women got to hold the wrench and to create policy.

About the Author

HCDVCC Board Member, Dr. Toby Myers