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Category: Sexual Assault

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IPV and LGBTQIA Mental Health Awareness Month Sexual Assault

Domestic Violence in the LGBTQIA Community: A Hidden Crisis

 

June is Pride Month, a time to celebrate the diversity and resilience of the LGBTQIA community. However, it is also an important moment to acknowledge and address the significant challenges faced by this community, including domestic violence. Understanding the unique dynamics and statistics surrounding intimate partner violence (IPV) in the LGBTQIA community is crucial for effective prevention and support.

Statistics and Trends
Domestic violence in the LGBTQIA community is a pervasive issue that often goes underreported and underacknowledged. Nationally, research shows that 43.8% of lesbian women and 61.1% of bisexual women have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner at some point in their lives. For gay and bisexual men, the rates are 26% and 37.3%, respectively. These rates are significantly higher than those reported by heterosexual individuals, indicating a troubling disparity.

In Houston and Harris County, Texas, the situation reflects broader national trends. Domestic violence homicides have increased sharply in recent years, with intimate partner violence homicides in the area doubling from 32 in 2019 to 64 in 2022. The increase in calls to shelters and domestic violence hotlines also highlights the growing need for resources and support for victims in the region.

Why It Happens
Several factors contribute to the high rates of domestic violence in the LGBTQIA community:

  • Stigma and Discrimination: LGBTQIA individuals often face societal stigma and discrimination, which can isolate them and make it harder to seek help.
  • Lack of Support Services: Many domestic violence services are not equipped to handle the unique needs of LGBTQIA individuals, leading to a lack of accessible and appropriate resources.
  • Internalized Homophobia/Biphobia/Transphobia: Internalized negative beliefs about one’s own LGBTQIA identity can contribute to staying in an abusive relationship.
  • Outing as a Threat: Abusers may threaten to “out” their partners to family, friends, or employers as a form of control.

Who Is More Frequently Affected
Certain groups within the LGBTQIA community are more vulnerable to domestic violence:

  1. Transgender Individuals: Transgender people, particularly transgender women of color, experience disproportionately high rates of violence and homicide.
  2. Bisexual Individuals: Bisexual individuals often face abuse from both same-sex and different-sex partners.
  3. Youth: LGBTQIA youth are at higher risk of experiencing dating violence, often compounded by lack of family support.

Tips for Victims of Intimate Partner Violence

  • Reach Out for Help: Contact local LGBTQIA-friendly domestic violence organizations and hotlines. In Houston, the Montrose Center provides specialized services for LGBTQIA individuals facing domestic violence.
  • Create a Safety Plan: Develop a plan that includes safe places to go, people you can call, and important items to take if you need to leave an abusive situation quickly.
  • Document the Abuse: Keep a record of incidents, including dates, times, and descriptions of the abuse. This can be useful for legal action or obtaining protective orders.
  • Seek Legal Protection: Obtain a protective order if necessary. Legal services are available to help navigate this process.
  • Therapy and Support Groups: Engage in therapy or support groups that cater to LGBTQIA individuals to receive emotional support and validation.

Addressing domestic violence in the LGBTQIA community requires a multifaceted approach that includes increasing awareness, improving access to resources, and fostering an environment where victims feel safe and supported to seek help. During Pride Month, and beyond, it is essential to continue advocating for the rights and safety of all individuals within the LGBTQIA community.

For more information on resources and support in the Houston area, you can visit the Montrose Center’s website.

Categories
Community DVAM Sexual Assault

Domestic Violence Awareness Month – A Time for Action and Reflection

Domestic Violence Awareness Month A Time for Action and Reflection. Image is mostly purple with a white heart and a purple ribbon for DVAM
Domestic Violence Awareness Month A Time for Action and Reflection. Image is mostly purple with a white heart and a purple ribbon for DVAM

October marks Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), a time to focus on one of the most pervasive issues facing communities across the globe. While domestic violence occurs year-round, this month offers an opportunity for concentrated efforts to raise awareness, honor victims, and mobilize communities toward change. Domestic violence affects individuals regardless of gender, sexuality, race, or socioeconomic status, and understanding its impact—especially within local contexts like Harris County—reveals the urgency for both preventive measures and survivor support.

Why Domestic Violence Awareness Month Matters

DVAM began as a way to shed light on the struggles of survivors and create a platform for discussing solutions. Domestic violence is not just physical; it encompasses emotional, psychological, and financial abuse. The month aims to create a dialogue where survivors feel supported, and the broader community is educated on identifying abuse and providing help.

According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men experience physical violence by an intimate partner during their lifetime. While these statistics are alarming on a national scale, they take on a more poignant meaning when viewed locally. In Harris County, the rise in intimate partner violence homicides and shelter requests underscores the critical nature of this issue.

Domestic Violence in Harris County: A Stark Reality

The Houston area has seen a concerning rise in domestic violence, particularly in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic. A University of Houston study revealed that intimate partner homicides in the region doubled over a three-year period, with 64 deaths in 2022 compared to 32 in 2019. The pandemic further exacerbated the crisis, with victims finding it harder to seek shelter or leave abusive situations due to lockdowns and fear of contracting COVID-19.

Shelters in Harris County are also under tremendous strain. Despite a growing need, the county only has 330 shelter beds for survivors, while a city like New York, which has twice the population, offers over 3,500 beds. The lack of sufficient housing is a critical barrier to leaving abusive relationships. In 2022, more than 1,300 households in Harris County requested housing due to domestic violence, showing the demand far outstrips the available resources.

Moreover, the demographics of intimate partner violence in the county reveal disparities. While women are the majority of victims, Black women represent 52% of female intimate partner homicides, though they account for only 20% of the female population. These figures show a troubling overrepresentation of violence against Black women, which requires specific community engagement and tailored solutions.

Raising Awareness and Mobilizing Support

DVAM is more than just a time to raise awareness; it’s a call to action. Local organizations, including the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council (HCDVCC), work tirelessly year-round to support survivors and prevent violence, but they need community engagement to effect lasting change. HCDVCC leads efforts such as increasing access to shelter, housing, and comprehensive survivor services, but like many organizations, they remain underfunded. The University of Houston’s report recommended a $1 million per year investment in domestic violence services over five years to address these gaps.

One of the key messages during DVAM is the importance of understanding the signs of abuse. Domestic violence often starts subtly, with emotional manipulation or financial control, before escalating into physical violence. Recognizing these signs early can prevent abuse from worsening. Community members can play a vital role as active bystanders—offering support to those in need and providing resources like hotline numbers or shelter information.

The Ripple Effect of Domestic Violence

The impact of domestic violence extends beyond the immediate victim. Children exposed to domestic violence are more likely to experience emotional trauma, which can have long-term psychological effects, including anxiety, depression, and even perpetuating the cycle of abuse as adults. Economic abuse is also prevalent, with many victims trapped in financially dependent relationships that make leaving even more challenging.

These ripple effects mean that domestic violence is not just a personal issue—it’s a public health crisis. Supporting victims through affordable housing, legal advocacy, and mental health services is critical. Harris County’s public health initiatives, in collaboration with local agencies, aim to address these intersections of violence and public health by promoting equity and providing resources to underserved populations.

How You Can Help

Domestic Violence Awareness Month offers numerous opportunities to get involved and support survivors. Here are some ways you can make a difference:

  • Educate Yourself: Understanding the signs of domestic violence and how to provide support is the first step. Attend local workshops or virtual training sessions on recognizing abuse.
  • Volunteer or Donate: Local shelters and organizations often rely on donations and volunteer work. Whether it’s your time or financial contributions, every bit helps.
  • Speak Up: If you suspect someone is experiencing domestic violence, reach out to them in a non-judgmental way. Let them know they are not alone and provide them with resources such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-SAFE).
  • Advocate for Policy Change: Local and national policies play a significant role in how survivors are supported and how perpetrators are held accountable. Advocacy at the local level can lead to better funding for shelters and legal services.

Moving Beyond Awareness

As we recognize Domestic Violence Awareness Month, it’s important to remember that this issue doesn’t go away when October ends. For many survivors, every day is a fight for safety and healing. Community members, local organizations, and policymakers must continue working toward solutions that address the root causes of domestic violence and provide the necessary support systems for survivors.

The path forward involves acknowledging the complex nature of domestic violence—addressing not only the physical harm but also the emotional, financial, and psychological abuse that often go unnoticed. Together, we can create a safer community where everyone has access to healthy, violence-free relationships.

By promoting awareness, offering support, and fostering community-wide engagement, Domestic Violence Awareness Month can be a catalyst for change. However, the work must continue year-round to ensure that survivors receive the support they need, and future violence is prevented.

Categories
Community Community Share Sexual Assault

Meet ColorMeSafe!

Who is Color me SAFE?

Color me SAFE is a family crisis management consulting firm serving mostly Texas and occasionally out-of-state clients. Our mission is to assist families of all backgrounds by offering guidance, solutions, and education regarding child welfare issues. Our team has over 50 years of combined experience, including several decades working for Child Protective Services. Since Color me SAFE was founded, in 2012, our team has been empowering, educating, and protecting your most valuable asset – your child.

Color me SAFE specializes in cases where CPS is directly involved: divorce & custody issues, coparenting conflict, parent/child conflict, and other matters involving child-welfare. We work directly with families, including refugees and immigrant families, therapists, schools, family law attorneys, and nonprofit organizations that serve survivors of domestic violence, and the community in general.

Often, families feel powerless and helpless in dealing with government institutions such as CPS – they need an advocate by their side to ensure their rights are protected and institutions are held accountable.

When families are referred to us, they are often traumatized, helpless, scared, lost, with the fear their children may be taken away, not knowing what to do or who to turn to. Unfortunately, through our experiences at CPS and beyond, it is precisely the families who are more vulnerable that are treated the worst, often being discriminated, revictimized, their civil rights abused by the institutions who were supposed to protect them. It’s those disparities, inequities, and inequalities that led us to create Color me SAFE and do what we do.

We’ve helped families with some of the most heart-breaking cases such as a family that had their three-month-old baby removed after going to the ER for an isolated incident that was completely misunderstood and overreacted. The parents were recent immigrants, their English wasn’t polished, and, in that stressful situation, they were not able to explain satisfactory what had happened. Unfortunately, they went on for months and spent thousands of dollars in attorney fees before their family was able to reunite.

In another case, we were able to guide a survivor of domestic violence, whose daughter was also being sexually abused by her own father. He was well connected and was using the law to his advantage. In this case, CPS initially misunderstood the dynamics of what was happening, and we were able to help make her case heard and, at the end, justice prevailed.

Over the years, we have come across numerous such families that needed our assistance and guidance but could not afford our services. We have taken more than forty pro-bono cases since we began this work and invested almost 1000 hours to support these families. Unfortunately, we were unable to support and guide several other families who needed us due to limited resources.

This is the ultimate reason we launched the Color me SAFE Foundation as a 501c3 at the end of 2022. We do not want any family to face a child or family related crisis without support, independently of their economic means. Besides working directly with families who do not have the resources, Color me SAFE Foundation will also be launching other education initiatives to empower our communities.

To us, it’s not about a paycheck or closing a case file, it’s when a family comes back months later saying, “thank you for keeping my family together.”

Our Team on the Ground:

Gauthami Vemula-Queijo, MS, MSE (Founder & Chief Empathy Officer)
Britany Myers, LCSW (Director of Education)
Karen Ricks, LCSW (Consultant & Director Home Assessments)
Saranya Kari, BS (Senior Intern)

To learn more about Color me SAFE, please visit the website and you can also follow ColorMeSafe on the following social media platforms.

Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn

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Community Share Mental Health Awareness Month Sexual Assault Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

Active Bystander: Empowering Change & Promoting Safety

This month is Bystander Awareness Month! This is a time when we focus on fostering a culture of active bystanders and encouraging individuals to play an essential role in creating safer and more inclusive communities. Let’s explore the concept of an active bystander, delve into the significance of being proactive in various situations, and provide practical steps on what to do when faced with witnessing concerning incidents.

Understanding Active Bystanders:
An active bystander is someone who chooses not to be a passive observer but takes a proactive stance in addressing and preventing harmful situations. Instead of turning a blind eye or assuming someone else will intervene, active bystanders embrace the responsibility of making a positive impact when they see something wrong unfolding before them.

The Importance of Being an Active Bystander:

Promoting Safety: Being an active bystander is crucial for creating a safe environment. By actively intervening or reporting concerning situations, you contribute to the prevention of potential harm to individuals or the community at large.

Fostering Empathy and Compassion: Active bystanders demonstrate empathy and compassion by offering support to those who may be in distress or facing adversity. Your intervention can provide comfort, reassurance, and demonstrate that individuals are not alone in difficult situations.

Challenging Norms and Behaviors: Active bystanders have the power to challenge harmful norms, such as bullying, discrimination, or harassment, by speaking up and standing against such behavior. By doing so, you help establish a new standard of respect, equality, and inclusivity.

What to Do When You See Something:

Assess the Situation: Observe the situation carefully to determine if intervention is necessary or if someone’s safety is at risk. Trust your instincts but be mindful of your personal safety as well.

Call for Help: If immediate danger is present or a crime is being committed, contact emergency services such as the police, fire department, or medical services. Provide them with accurate details about the incident and the location.

Create a Distraction: In non-threatening situations, creating a distraction can divert attention and diffuse tension. This strategy can be effective in preventing a potentially harmful situation from escalating.

Direct Intervention: If it is safe to do so, directly intervene by addressing the situation calmly and assertively. Speak up against inappropriate behavior, offer assistance to someone in distress, or help diffuse a conflict by promoting dialogue and understanding.

Seek Support: If you are unsure about intervening alone, try to involve others nearby. Approach individuals who may be witnessing the same incident and encourage them to join forces with you in addressing the situation. Remember, collective action can be powerful.

Document and Report: If you cannot intervene directly or the situation has already resolved, document what you witnessed. Take note of details such as descriptions of individuals involved, time, and location. Report the incident to relevant authorities or organizations that can take appropriate action.

Becoming an active bystander requires courage, empathy, and a commitment to making a positive impact in our communities. By choosing to step forward and take action, we contribute to the creation of safer, more inclusive environments for everyone. This Bystander Awareness Month, let’s all pledge to be active bystanders and work together to build a society where compassion, respect, and intervention are valued. Remember, your voice and actions matter.

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Community Share domesticviolenceshelters DVAM Op-eds Sexual Assault

Houston Area Domestic Violence Providers Study – The Article

Blog Header for article "effects that domestic violence has on survivors’ mental health".

To download a copy of this study, please click the button below.

About the Author

headshot of Dr. Elizabeth Gregory

Professor of English and Director of Women’s Gender & Sexuality Studies

Elizabeth Gregory, Taylor Professor of Gender & Sexuality Studies and Professor of English, directs the WGSS Program and the UH Institute for Research on Women, Gender & Sexuality. She writes on Marianne Moore’s poetry and women’s work and fertility. Read more about her here.

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Community Share domesticviolenceshelters DVAM Op-eds Sexual Assault

Houston Area Domestic Violence Providers Study

Blog Header for article "effects that domestic violence has on survivors’ mental health".

UH Institute for Research on Women, Gender & Sexuality
Report to the Community

February 2023

Houston Area Domestic Violence Providers Study
+ Initial Local DV Data Aggregation

Study recommends major investment in DV infrastructure as IPV homicides double in 3 years

This report shares the results of UH-IRWGS’s study of regional Domestic Violence [DV] Service Providers, based on interviews and group discussions with leaders of 12 local DV shelters and nonresidential agencies. It recommends significant community investment in expanded DV infrastructure coordination and staffing, to move from the current model of limited response to overwhelming demand to a model that allows the community to not only address DV cases more effectively but to analyze and address causes as well.

In addition, the report contains an initial aggregation of regional DV data – including data from some shelters, law enforcement, and nonresidential service providers (see Supplement). Future reports will provide more detail and include data from more sources.<p/p>

Executive Summary

Houston has a major problem with Domestic Violence assaults and homicides: Calls for Shelter and Calls for Service from the police are high, and IPV homicides doubled between 2019 and 2022, rising from 32 to 64 across the two largest police departments in Harris County (HPD and HCSO).

  • Violence is rampant in this region, across ranks. As was indicated by the recent IPV assault by the (now former) UT basketball coach and January DV cases involving a house set fire with family members within and the decapitation of a young immigrant bride.
  • We need a stronger DV infrastructure to turn the tide.
  • Based on qualitative interviews and group discussions with local DV service providers as well as local data analysis, this report recommends a significant strategic investment in strengthening the currently under-resourced DV service-provider collaborative. A centralized coordination infrastructure, with administrative staff based both centrally and within individual agencies, would enable DV providers across the region (shelters and nonresidential providers in collaboration with law enforcement, courts, and other social services agencies encountering DV) to operate and strategize collaboratively, improve and expand services, and address causes.
  • While funds for direct services are essential, expanded investment in DV infrastructure would be a game changer.
  • Currently, each provider operates on its own, creating inefficiencies at all levels: operational redundancies, inconsistent standards, a lack of unified voice on DV, and, because each is overtaxed with providing service to those at their door, an inability to see much beyond the immediate need
  • The collaborative needs a core administrative team, including an Operations Manager, a Communications Coordinator, a Researcher/Evaluator and a Grant Writer, based in the Harris County DV Coordinating Council. In addition, expanded staffing is needed within provider organizations to carry out collaborative initiatives. An investment for this purpose of $1,000,000 / year for five years from local funders would be transformative
  • A smaller initial infrastructure investment would get change under way, but working by half measures as has long been the case in this region will not enable the real change needed. Over time, grant funding will increase, to cover costs.
  • This significant strategic investment will allow providers to
    • analyze and reframe their services & policies
    • deliver services more effectively
    • work with agencies across the community to address the causes of violence in our region
    • raise more funds and expand services
    • advocate for regional policy change around the issues that give rise to DV

Newly Aggregated DV Data

  • You can’t fix a problem, if you don’t know what it is. Due to costs and complexity, the limited DV data collected to date has not previously been combined to provide a full regional picture. This groundbreaking report begins to aggregate local DV data. Future reports will provide more detail and include data from more shelters, agencies & regional police departments, with a goal to inform response.
  • The Covid emergency raised the level of domestic violence in the Houston area. And per HPD and HCSO data, identified Intimate Partner Violence [IPV] homicides continued to rise after the lockdown ended—doubling in their combined jurisdictions between 2019 and 2022, rising from 32/year to 64/year over that period. That’s a 73% rise in HPD – and 160% in HCSO (a combined 100% rise). [See Figure S-3.]
  • The rise overlaps with the move to permit-less carry which went into effect in Texas in September 2021. Between 2020 and 2022 the number of HPD IPV homicides committed with a gun increased by 61%, while the overall number of IPV homicides increased by 52%. While other factors may play in, the easy availability of guns puts many women at risk for homicide, as well as for terroristic threats of homicide within IPV situations.
  • While overall homicides and non-IPV FV homicides fell in 2022 in HPD data, IPV homicides continued to rise.
  • Calls for shelter have also risen steadily since the lockdown, to rates above what they were prior to March 2020, and callers are regularly turned away for lack of space.
  • Overall DV calls for service have fallen since 2020 in both HPD and HCSO, but numbers remain high: HPD received between 25,000 to 27,000 calls for service around DV for 2019-2021. This data is not sortable by IPV, so we don’t know if there is an effect similar to that in the homicide data differentiating IPV and non-IPV outcomes. We have not received complete 2022 data, but it looks on track to roughly 24,000 in 2022.
  • Many thousands more suffer without reaching out, not believing things would improve if they did or not knowing that help is available.
  • Harris County has 330 shelter beds, while New York City, with twice the population, has more than ten times as many shelter beds, at 3500.
  • Though affordable housing is the best solution for many, it is not widely available; shelters, nonresidential providers and mobile advocates provide alternatives for those in immediate need.
  • A targeted investment in DV administrative infrastructure can turn the tide on DV assaults and homicides.
  • Improved victim service delivery along with a community violence prevention focus will benefit all Houstonians.
  • Though this change will require significant start-up costs, the infrastructure thus created will increase ability to bring in more federal and other external funds down the line.

Additional Findings

  • The high volume of people experiencing IPV in this region links directly to the state’s low level of family support infrastructure, the lack of affordable housing and the low wages earned by Texas women.
  • People dependent on others, especially those with children they don’t want to unhouse, become more vulnerable to violence at the hands of those they depend upon.
  • This is true at any income level but is particularly true for those at low incomes. Since higher-income women may be able to leave when things get grim and still keep their children and themselves housed, they are less likely to utilize shelters than low-income women. Higher-income women more often employ the safety planning resources providers offer.
  • Though Houston’s DV service providers were already strapped before the pandemic, since its onset and in the face of multiplying demand, DV shelters and other providers have stepped up services, helped by Covid Emergency federal funds. Before these funds are gone, the community needs to reorganize its response to DV for the long haul.
  • While DV providers have offered survivors a range of services for some time, the pandemic spurred innovations that have improved service delivery overall: including Bed Availability App, DV High Risk Teams / DART, Mobile Advocacy, Flexible Funding, Text Hotlines, Hotel Stays, Longer Stays, etc.
  • Many in need do not know of, or feel distrustful of, DV service providers, so clearer communications and continued trust building are needed.
  • Transportation is a major issue for those seeking shelter across Harris County.
  • The HCDVCC coordinated housing queue is a great improvement on the past, but it met less than one third of eligible demand in 2022.
  • Staff burnout has been a huge issue for shelters during Covid.
  • Black women in economic precarity are overrepresented in shelter in Harris County.
  • Undocumented Hispanic women suffering DV seem underrepresented in shelters, likely due to threats of deportation from their abusers or lack of information on their rights.
  • Asian and Muslim women generally reach out to culturally specific DV agencies, when they reach out.
  • The leadership of DV agencies is now more inclusive of women of color than it has been historically, enabling wider range of insight and overcoming of survivors’ distrust.
  • All DV leaders need sustained support and engagement from the community as they struggle to address the ongoing DV crisis here.
CLICK HERE TO SEE THE STUDY

About the Author

headshot of Dr. Elizabeth Gregory

Professor of English and Director of Women’s Gender & Sexuality Studies

Elizabeth Gregory, Taylor Professor of Gender & Sexuality Studies and Professor of English, directs the WGSS Program and the UH Institute for Research on Women, Gender & Sexuality. She writes on Marianne Moore’s poetry and women’s work and fertility. Read more about her here.

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Community Share Mental Health Awareness Month Op-eds Sexual Assault

Effects that Domestic Violence has on Survivors’ Mental Health

Blog Header for article "effects that domestic violence has on survivors’ mental health".
Blog Header for article "effects that domestic violence has on survivors’ mental health".
As a Lead Trauma Support Partner (TSP) and License Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), I wanted to touch on the effects that domestic violence has on survivors’ mental health, since its Mental Health Awareness Month. We know from research that domestic violence (whether you’ve endured it personally or witnessed it as a child) increases one’s risk of experiencing depression, anxiety, substance use, suicidal behaviors and PTSD. But what do these “labels” actually look like in the day to day? People think depression is “feeling down or hopeless” and while that’s true for a lot of people, depression can also look like irritability, increased or decreased appetite, need for sleep, and /or interest in sex. It can also look like someone no longer doing the things that they used to enjoy like connecting with friends or family, participating in a hobby or pleasurable activities. Similarly, people think anxiety is “intense worrying’ but anxiety can also look like increased irritability, difficulty concentrating or restlessness (feeling like you always have to be doing something) or feeling like something bad is going to happen. Maybe you’re short tempered with your kids or peers. Maybe you’re on edge all the time. These are all symptoms of anxiety. Lastly, people think PTSD is “flashbacks and hypervigilance” and again that is true, but PTSD can also look like difficulty concentrating, memory problems or forgetfulness, impaired functioning at home, school or work, feeling numb, wanting to be alone, engaging in risky behaviors and difficulty falling asleep. Its important to recognize these “other” symptoms so that you can get help (if you’re the trauma survivor) or you can adjust your interventions (if you’re the advocate). If you’re the trauma survivor and you’re experiencing any of these symptoms, talk to someone – a trusted medical or mental health professional, a clergy member, a family elder, a friend or call 988 – the national crisis line if you’re in a mental health crisis. If you’re an advocate, ask the right questions, connect your client to services, be patient and understanding and most importantly, educate your clients about these other less common symptoms because it just might be what they needed to hear to seek out support. With so many service options (in-person, via tele-health and even text messaging), it’s never been more accessible to get the help you need. Join me this month as we work towards bringing awareness to mental health.

About the Author

Profile Picture for Desiré Martinez, LCSW-S Lead Trauma Support Partner

Desiré Martinez, LCSW-S is a Lead Trauma Support Partner for HCDVCC.

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Community Share Op-eds Sexual Assault

Healthy Relationships

Article about Healthy Relationships: Image shows hands over one another.
Article about Healthy Relationships: Image shows hands over one another.

1 in 3 teens will experience some form of physical, sexual, verbal, or emotional abuse by a dating partner and approximately 8.5 million women experienced sexual assault before the age of 18. Teen dating violence, a form of intimate partner violence, is the most prevalent form of youth violence – affecting youth regardless of gender, race, religion, sexual orientation, or socioeconomic status.

Just a couple months ago I was invited out to Austin, Texas to conduct a training for a group of young college-aged women. I began my presentation with the same eye-opening activity I always use  – “Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Now, raise your hand if you either have experienced or know someone who has experienced some form of intimate partner violence. Now open your eyes and look around.” There was not a single hand in the room that was not raised…

After concluding my presentation with the young women, a few came up to me to express how they wished they had the opportunity to learn about healthy relationships before they had started dating. So, here is where you come in – preventing teen dating violence requires a broad coalition of parents, schools, and community organizations to join forces to start having conversations about healthy relationships at an early age.

Here are a few steps you can take to help prevent teen dating violence:

  • Become a trusted source for information about relationships – talk about relationships, including difficult topics like red flags, sex, and dating violence.
  • Teach your children about healthy relationships – how to form them and how to recognize them. Healthy relationships are built on trust, honesty, respect, equality, and compromise. Children need to hear about what constitutes a healthy relationship and how safe relationships are established.
  • Encourage children to be assertive – to speak up for themselves and voice their opinions or needs. Teach and model ways to say “NO!”
  • Help children recognize warning signs of an unhealthy relationship – include jealousy, controlling behavior, and other red flags.
  • Encourage children to be active bystanders – to take action/give support when a friend is in an unhealthy relationship.

 

Effective prevention and action has been seen to significantly decrease cases of intimate partner violence in teens. If you are interested in learning more about healthy relationships or wanting to set up a healthy relationships training, please email tishya@dayahouston.org. 

Let’s do our part to decrease the number of hands that go up when asked “raise your hand if you either have experienced or know someone who has experienced some form of intimate partner violence.”

About the Author

TishyaBedi

Tishya Bedi is the Director of Outreach and Education at Daya Houston.