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Tag: sexualviolence

Enhanced Safety Planning For Survivors of Domestic Violence

January 30 @ 1:00 pm – 3:00 pm CST


FULL-THIS TRAINING HAS REACHED CAPACITY

This training will explore how advocates and organizations can develop responsive, trauma-informed safety strategies and strengthen organizational preparedness.

Topics will include key recent policy and protocol changes impacting immigrant survivors, tools for enhanced safety planning within the law and considerations for organizations. 

Registrations must be completed using your agency email address.
After registering, you’ll receive a confirmation email within two business days with more details.
Free

When you register, you’ll be added to our newsletter so you can stay connected and hear about upcoming events and updates.

Thecia Jenkins

Enhanced Safety Planning For Survivors of Domestic Violence

January 29 @ 10:00 am – 12:00 pm CST


This training will explore how advocates and organizations can develop responsive, trauma-informed safety strategies and strengthen organizational preparedness.

Topics will include key recent policy and protocol changes impacting immigrant survivors, tools for enhanced safety planning within the law and considerations for organizations. 

BOTH OF THESE TRAININGS ARE AT CAPACITY
Free

When you register, you’ll be added to our newsletter so you can stay connected and hear about upcoming events and updates.

Thecia Jenkins

REGISTER FOR FRIDAY'S SESSION HERE
Categories
Holidays

When the Holidays Bring Harm: Understanding Domestic Violence During December

woman in a santa hat withchristmas trees in the background looking stressed with text "When the Holidays Bring Harm: Understanding Domestic Violence During December"
woman in a santa hat withchristmas trees in the background looking stressed with text "When the Holidays Bring Harm: Understanding Domestic Violence During December"

The December holidays are often portrayed as a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration. But for many people living with domestic violence, this season brings heightened danger rather than comfort. Research consistently shows that domestic violence incidents increase during the holidays, creating urgent safety concerns for survivors and their families.

Why Violence Escalates During the Holidays

Several factors contribute to the rise in domestic violence during December. Financial stress intensifies as people face pressure to buy gifts, host gatherings, and meet seasonal expectations. Increased alcohol consumption at holiday parties and family gatherings can lower inhibitions and escalate conflicts. Forced proximity during time off work means survivors spend more continuous hours with their harm-doers, with fewer opportunities to seek help or find respite.

The social pressure to present a “perfect family” image can also trap survivors in dangerous situations. Many feel compelled to maintain appearances during holiday gatherings, making it harder to reach out for support or acknowledge the severity of their circumstances.

Recognizing the Signs

Domestic violence takes many forms beyond physical abuse. It includes emotional manipulation, economic control, isolation from friends and family, threats, intimidation, and coercive behavior. During the holidays, you might notice someone who seems anxious about their partner’s reaction to social interactions, makes excuses for injuries or frequent cancellations, or appears increasingly isolated from their support network.

How to Support Survivors Safely

If you suspect someone is experiencing domestic violence, your instinct may be to encourage them to leave immediately. However, leaving an abusive relationship is the most dangerous time for a victim. Research shows that the period during and immediately after separation sees the highest risk of severe violence or homicide. A harm-doer’s need to maintain control often escalates dramatically when they sense they’re losing power over their partner.

Instead of pressuring someone to leave, offer consistent, non-judgmental support. Let them know you’re concerned and available to help without demanding they take specific actions. Respect their timeline and their intimate knowledge of their own situation. Survivors are the experts on their own safety, and they’re often making careful calculations about when and how to leave based on factors outsiders can’t fully see.

You can offer practical support by helping them create a safety plan, which might include identifying safe spaces, keeping important documents accessible, establishing code words with trusted friends, and knowing where to access resources. Listen without judgment, believe what they tell you, and avoid criticizing their choices or their harm-doer, which can push them further into isolation.

Reporting Domestic Violence Responsibly

If you witness domestic violence or believe someone is in immediate danger, calling 911 is appropriate. However, be mindful that involving law enforcement isn’t always the safest option for every survivor, particularly for those in marginalized communities who may face additional risks from police interaction.

When reporting concerns, focus on observable behaviors and specific incidents rather than making assumptions. If you’re reporting on behalf of someone else, understand that this removes their control over the situation and could potentially escalate danger. Whenever possible, support the survivor in making their own decisions about reporting.

Resources and Support

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, confidential support is available 24/7 through the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or by texting “START” to 88788. Online chat is also available at thehotline.org.

Local domestic violence agencies can provide crisis intervention, safety planning, emergency shelter, legal advocacy, and counseling services. Many organizations offer specialized support for specific communities and can help navigate the complex process of increasing safety, whether that involves leaving or staying.

Community Responsibility

Addressing domestic violence requires community-wide awareness and coordinated response. We all have a role to play in creating a culture that refuses to tolerate abuse, that believes in survivors, and that provides meaningful support without judgment.

This holiday season, the most important gift we can offer survivors is patience, respect for their autonomy, and unwavering support for whatever decisions they make about their own safety. Sometimes the most helpful thing we can do is simply let someone know: I see you, I believe you, and I’m here whenever you need me.

If you’re concerned about someone’s safety, trust your instincts but also trust their expertise in their own lives. Together, we can create communities where everyone can experience true safety and peace, not just during the holidays but every day of the year.

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)
Crisis Text Line: Text “START” to 88788
Online Chat: thehotline.org

Categories
Legacies Womens History Month

Survivor Pioneers and Women Who Transformed the Domestic Violence Movement

Honoring Women’s History Month

March is Women’s History Month, a time to celebrate the achievements and resilience of women who have shaped history. In the fight against domestic violence, many brave women have used their voices, experiences, and leadership to advocate for survivors, push for legal reforms, and build support systems. These pioneers have laid the foundation for today’s domestic violence movement, ensuring that survivors receive the help and justice they deserve.

Survivor Leaders Who Made a Difference

Ruth A. White – The Early Voice for Battered Women

One of the earliest survivor advocates, Ruth A. White helped establish the first shelters for battered women in the 1970s. Recognizing the need for safe spaces for survivors fleeing abuse, she worked tirelessly to create resources and public awareness about domestic violence. Her work laid the groundwork for modern domestic violence shelters nationwide.

Mildred Muhammad – From Survivor to Advocate

Mildred Muhammad, the ex-wife of the D.C. Sniper John Allen Muhammad, turned her personal experience of abuse into a powerful advocacy platform. She speaks about the intersection of domestic violence and coercive control, highlighting the dangers survivors face even after leaving abusive relationships. Through her work, she has helped shift the conversation to include emotional and psychological abuse as critical components of domestic violence.

Leslie Morgan Steiner – Giving a Voice to Survivors

Author and advocate Leslie Morgan Steiner uses her story of surviving an abusive relationship to educate others about the warning signs of domestic violence. Her TED Talk, Why Domestic Violence Victims Don’t Leave, has reached millions worldwide, encouraging people to better understand the complexities of abusive relationships.

Women Who Pioneered the Domestic Violence Movement

Dr. Toby Myers -“Godmother” of the Domestic Violence Movement in Texas

Dr. Toby Myers used her experience as a survivor to become a lifelong advocate for women.  She is a founding member of the Houston Area Women’s Center, often waking her 3 children in the middle of the night to go unlock the house used as the first HAWC shelter for a woman and her children.  She is a founding member of the Texas Council on Family Violence, realizing bringing people together to advocate is the best way to be heard.  She helped create AVDA and started The Pivot Project which has turned into one of the most successful and respected battering intervention programs in Texas.  She has served, mentored, and guided the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council from day one.  She is the longest tenured Board member of HCDVCC and continues to be active in several HCDVCC committees.   Her passion and dedication to women is a bright light in this often-dreary world.  She is the guiding star to so many. 

Ellen Pence – Transforming the Justice System

Ellen Pence was a leader in changing how the justice system responds to domestic violence. As a co-founder of the Duluth Model, she helped develop the widely used Power and Control Wheel, which illustrates the tactics abusers use to maintain control. Her work has influenced domestic violence intervention programs across the world.

Tiloma Jayasinghe – A Global Advocate for Women’s Rights

Tiloma Jayasinghe has dedicated her career to advocating for survivors on a global scale. As a former leader of Sakhi for South Asian Women, she has worked to provide culturally specific domestic violence services, ensuring that women from immigrant and marginalized communities receive the support they need.

Estér King – A Champion for Policy Reform

Estér King helped shape legislative policies that protect survivors from housing discrimination. Thanks to her advocacy, laws have been enacted to ensure that survivors of domestic violence cannot be evicted simply for experiencing abuse in their homes. Her work has provided stability and security to countless survivors seeking to rebuild their lives.

The Legacy of These Trailblazers

The women highlighted above, along with countless others, have changed the landscape of domestic violence advocacy. From legal reforms to public awareness campaigns, they have fought to make the world safer for survivors. Their contributions continue to inspire new generations of advocates, ensuring that the fight for safety, justice, and empowerment carries on.

As we honor Women’s History Month, let us recognize the courage of survivors and the relentless work of those who have dedicated their lives to ending domestic violence. Their legacy is a reminder that change is possible, and every voice matters in the fight against abuse.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233) or visit thehotline.org for support.

Categories
Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

teen female looking at phone, stressed with the title of the article on the side (Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month: What to Look For & How to Help).
teen female looking at phone, stressed with the title of the article on the side (Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month: What to Look For & How to Help).

Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month: What to Look For & How to Help

Teen relationships should be fun, safe, and built on mutual respect. But for too many teens, dating turns into something dangerous—something that hurts instead of uplifts. February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, a time to shine a light on an issue that affects 1 in 3 teens in the U.S. If you’re in an unhealthy relationship, know someone who is, or just want to be prepared to support a friend, keep reading.

Spotting the Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship

Teen dating violence isn’t just physical. It can be emotional, psychological, digital, sexual, or financial abuse. The person being abused may not even realize what’s happening at first. Here’s what to look for:

  • Extreme jealousy or possessiveness – A partner who constantly checks your phone, gets mad if you talk to others, or accuses you of cheating without reason.
  • Controlling behavior – They tell you who you can and can’t hang out with, what to wear, or how to act.
  • Love bombing, then withdrawal – At first, they’re over-the-top sweet, texting nonstop, giving gifts, making big promises. Then they pull away, punish you with silence, or make you feel like you’re “too much.”
  • Embarrassing or humiliating you – Making fun of you in front of others, calling you names, or spreading rumors.
  • Threats or intimidation – Saying they’ll hurt themselves if you leave, threatening to ruin your reputation, or using fear to control you.
  • Physical harm – Pushing, hitting, throwing things, or any kind of physical violence—even just once.
  • Digital abuse – Hacking into your accounts, demanding passwords, sending unwanted explicit photos, or tracking your location.

Red Flags That Shouldn’t Be Ignored

🚩 They rush the relationship and say things like, “I’ve never felt this way before” within days or weeks.
🚩 You feel like you have to walk on eggshells around them.
🚩 They pressure you into things you’re uncomfortable with—whether it’s sex, drugs, or skipping school.
🚩 They make you doubt yourself—gaslighting you into thinking you’re overreacting or imagining things.
🚩 They isolate you from your family and friends, making you dependent on them.
🚩 You feel afraid to leave because you don’t know what they’ll do.

How to Help a Friend in an Abusive Relationship

If you notice a friend pulling away, acting different, or making excuses for their partner’s toxic behavior, they may be in an abusive relationship. It’s not always easy to get through to them, but here’s what you can do:

  • Believe them. If they open up, listen without judgment. Don’t minimize their experience by saying, “It’s probably not that bad.”
  • Avoid blaming them. They may not leave right away, and that’s okay. Instead of, “Why don’t you just break up?” try, “I’m here whenever you need me.”
  • Help them see the signs. Gently point out concerning behaviors. “I’ve noticed your partner always checks your phone. Does that make you uncomfortable?”
  • Stay connected. Abusers isolate their victims. Keep inviting your friend to hang out and check in often.
  • Offer a way out. Help them make a safety plan (more on that below) or offer to go with them to talk to a trusted adult.

Getting Out of an Abusive Relationship

Leaving isn’t easy, especially when emotions are involved. But safety comes first. Here’s how to make an exit plan:

✅ Talk to someone you trust – A parent, school counselor, teacher, coach, or friend. You don’t have to do this alone.
✅ Plan your breakup in a safe place – If you’re afraid of their reaction, break up in a public place or over text. Do not meet alone.
✅ Block them on social media and your phone – This prevents them from harassing or manipulating you after the breakup.
✅ Gather evidence – If they’ve been threatening or abusive over text, save screenshots. You may need them later.
✅ Know your escape route – If they show up at your school or house, have a plan on where you’ll go and who you’ll call.
✅ Get professional help – Love Is Respect (866-331-9474) and The National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-7233) have 24/7 support.

You’re Not Alone – Support Is Out There

No one deserves to feel unsafe in a relationship. If you or someone you know is experiencing dating violence, help is available:

💜 Love Is Respect – Call 866-331-9474 or text “LOVEIS” to 22522 for confidential support.
💜 National Domestic Violence Hotline – 800-799-7233 or chat at thehotline.org.
💜 Talk to a trusted adult – A teacher, coach, school counselor, or family member can help you navigate your next steps.

Dating should feel exciting, safe, and uplifting—never scary or suffocating. If something doesn’t feel right, trust yourself. Help is always available, and you deserve better.

.

Categories
Community DVAM Voices Of Freedom

Reflecting on a Powerful Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Reflecting on a Powerful Domestic Violence Awareness Month

As October comes to an end, the pressing issue of gender-based violence, particularly domestic violence, remains at the forefront of our mission. Throughout Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council (HCDVCC), alongside our incredible community partners, dedicated time to amplifying the conversation around recognizing, responding to, and making referrals for domestic violence.

Throughout the month, the HCDVCC team had the privilege of supporting our partners at various events, including The Bridge, Fresh Spirit, Aid to Victims of Dometic Abuse (AVDA), and An Nisa Hope Center, who graciously invited us to participate in their galas and luncheons.

The Communications Department was busy during October appearing on KPRC, FOX 26 and KHOU discussing important issues about Domestic Violence.    Thank you to all the stations for making domestic violence a feature during October.   HCDVCC also participated in a panel discussion with AVDA, The Bridge, the District Attorney’s Office and the Houston Police Department at the United Way’s Interagency Meeting discussing issues and resources related to domestic violence for their Community Partners.

We partnered with AVDA and Daya to host an Interfaith Community Dialogue on Domestic Violence.  Advocates were joined by Faith Leaders for table talk discussions on Domestic Violence.  After the Dialogue, we held an evening of Remembrance, Caring and Hope to celebrate survivors and honor those we lost to domestic violence in the last year. We were honored to have several families who lost a loved one join us for this moving event. 

On October 9th, our Senior Director of Operations and Communications, Amy Smith, had the unique opportunity to meet with ten members of the Korean National Police Agency and provide training on the dynamics of domestic violence, Coordinated Community Responses (CCR), Risk Assessments, and Safety Planning. During their three-week visit to Houston, hosted by Sam Houston State University’s College of Criminal Justice, the group also met with representatives from the Harris County Sheriff’s Office, Houston Police Department, and other local agencies to compare international approaches to protecting vulnerable populations.

Thecia Jenkins, our Training and Outreach Director, participated in an event that was hosted in collaboration with State Representative Jolanda Jones and AVDA. This impactful session focused on identifying lethality risks in domestic violence situations and preventing abuse by promoting healthy relationships. Attendees were able to access real-time resources and connect with one another, sharing personal stories and finding support.

Our Voices of Freedom ambassadors—a remarkable group of survivors who have thrived and now lead as advocates—spearheaded a four-part social media series on Facebook. These posts addressed critical topics such as dismantling domestic violence myths, the journey from victimization to advocacy, engaging men in the conversation, faith-based responses to abuse, and the importance of self-care for both survivors and advocates.

Our Education and Outreach team was quite active this month partnering with local colleges and universities to lead discussions on healthy relationships. They reached over 700 youth and young adults, sparking conversations on domestic violence prevention. 

The Team hosted a Family Fun Day in partnership with Village Green.  This was one of the highlights of the month—a fun-filled day emphasizing the importance of community connections. This event also served as a precursor to next year’s Youth Boot Camp on Healthy Relationships.

The Team also hosted two outreach workshops one on Creating a Culture of Care: How healthy relationships and bystander intervention can make a difference. The participants learned essential skills to foster healthy relationships and intervene in potentially harmful situations. The second workshop was an Accountability Walk or Taking Responsibility for Our Actions and Ending Violence. This powerful, interactive activity allowed participants to step into the shoes of domestic violence offenders, raising awareness of the challenges they face on the road to rehabilitation.

This October also saw HCDVCC’s Client Support Groups engage in a creative and therapeutic project, where participants—mothers and children—used art to envision their personal, professional, and psychological futures.

We were honored to be in the company of amazing people and agencies when HCDVCC received one of Harris County District Attorney Kim Ogg’s Community Partner Awards.

While October has come to an end, our work is far from over. As we move toward the end of this year and into 2025, let’s continue to have these crucial conversations and advocate for those affected by domestic violence. Together, we can keep making a difference.

Categories
Community Community Share

Hispanic Roundtable – A Reflection

Photo of people who attended the HCDVCC Roundtable

Reflecting on HCDVCC’s Inaugural Hispanic Roundtable: Staff Perspectives

 

HCDVCC hosted the second in a series of Roundtable discussions aimed at specific communities.  The Coordinated Community Response in the Hispanic Community Roundtable was held on September 19th at the United Way with almost 50 people in attendance.  Below is a summary of the event by Daniana Trigoso-Kukulski, one of the DVCC Case Managers.

English Version   |   Spanish Version

I am pleased to share the success of our meeting with the Hispanic community in the past  week as part of the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinator Council. The gathering was not only impactful but also opened up a wealth of new opportunities to strengthen our initiatives in addressing domestic violence in underserved populations.

The discussions were rich with personal experience and insights that will help guide our future work. We were able to highlight key initiatives such as early intervention programs for immigrant and refugee families, trauma-informed care for children exposed to domestic violence, and culturally sensitive support services. The community’s engagement demonstrated their readiness to collaborate and support these efforts, creating a strong foundation for continued partnership.

Moving forward, we’ve identified several new opportunities for collaboration, including potential community workshops, outreach campaigns, and expanded mental health services tailored to the unique needs of the Hispanic population. These initiatives will help ensure that survivors receive the culturally appropriate care they need and that we are actively promoting education and prevention within the community.

We look forward to working closely with all of you as we take the next steps in advancing these important efforts and making a lasting difference in Harris County.

Spanish version:

Me complace compartir el éxito de nuestra reunión con la comunidad hispana la semana pasada como parte del Consejo de Coordinadores de Violencia Doméstica del Condado de Harris. La reunión no solo fue impactante, sino que también abrió una gran cantidad de nuevas oportunidades para fortalecer nuestras iniciativas para abordar la violencia doméstica en poblaciones desatendidas.

Las discusiones fueron ricas en experiencias y perspectivas personales que ayudarán a guiar nuestro trabajo futuro. Pudimos destacar iniciativas clave como programas de intervención temprana para familias inmigrantes y refugiadas, atención informada sobre el trauma para niños expuestos a la violencia doméstica y servicios de apoyo culturalmente sensibles. La participación de la comunidad demostró su disposición a colaborar y apoyar estos esfuerzos, creando una base sólida para una asociación continua.

En el futuro, hemos identificado varias nuevas oportunidades de colaboración, incluidos posibles talleres comunitarios, campañas de divulgación y servicios de salud mental ampliados adaptados a las necesidades únicas de la población hispana. Estas iniciativas ayudarán a garantizar que los sobrevivientes reciban la atención culturalmente apropiada que necesitan y que estemos promoviendo activamente la educación y la prevención dentro de la comunidad.

Espero trabajar estrechamente con todos ustedes a medida que damos los próximos pasos para avanzar en estos importantes esfuerzos y marcar una diferencia duradera en el condado de Harris.

Categories
Community Share Crime Victims

Commissioners Court

Greetings Advocates, Survivors, Stakeholders, & Community Members!

We have an ACTION ALERT we would like to share!  We would love for you to join us in speaking and/or showing up at Commissioner’s Court on Tuesday September 10 in support of the budget to continue Domestic Violence Assistance Funds.

We are thrilled that Harris County is recognizing the value of this important fund for survivors, and we are beyond grateful that Commissioners are considering the continuation of this assistance.  This is exciting news for our county, and we need YOUR HELP to make sure we voice our support for this fund!

If you’ve never provided public comment to Commissioners Court on an issue before, never fear!  Here are some important things to consider when signing up and in using your voice/making your statement:

Comments are restricted to 1 minute, so it’s helpful to write out what you’d like to say beforehand to ensure you adhere to the time given.  Public comment is generally provided at the beginning of the session, and registered names are called one at a time.

  • The Meeting Location – Commissioners Court meetings are held in-person at:  1001 Preston, 1st Floor, Houston, TX 77002 and meetings start at 10:00 am.  We hope to have quite a few folks sign up to speak, so please be prepared to stay for a while.  And even if you don’t feel comfortable providing comment, showing up will also be important!  We’d love for folks to fill the room – especially dressed in purple  to show our support.  Never discount the visual of a room full of people who took time out of their busy schedules and day to make sure their elected official sees and/or hears from them.  There is power in that!
  • What to Say – if you don’t know your Commissioner, you can find out by looking at the precinct maps here – Harris County Commissioner Court Precincts (harriscountytx.gov).

If you live in Harris County, it would be great to state who your Commissioner is as you begin your comments.  An example of this could go as follows:

Hello.  My name is ____________, and I live in Pct. ____________.  I am here today to voice my support for the Domestic Violence Assistance Funds because_____________________.

If you don’t live in Harris County, no worries!  Your comments will still be important because you WORK and/or provide service to survivors in Harris County.  So, an example of your statement could go as follows:

Hello.  My name is ____________, and I work for Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council.  I am here to voice my support for the Domestic Violence Assistance Funds because______________.

And the because will be important!  AND there is so much to say here that will be valuable!  For instance – If you have a specific story of a survivor you’d like to share (with the survivor’s permission), please do.  If you want to share how these funds made you feel in being able to do your work, please do!  If you want to talk about how proud you are of our county in recognizing the need for this additional support and really listening to what is working for our area, please do!  If you want to give a history lesson of how dv/ipv has been a longstanding epidemic in our community that has been under resourced and under funded for a very long time, please do!  The sky is the limit on what you could say and share!  And remember – first rule of advocacy especially in an area that you know so well – YOU ARE THE EXPERT ON THIS! Don’t let their position or “status” make you feel like you don’t know what you are talking about or that what you say isn’t valuable.

WE THE PEOPLE… 😊